On Monday, Carlos remembered us! And his Special Mother said that every time he heard foot-steps coming down the stairs he would ask if that was “Esteven” coming back to see him! Carlos even offered me one of his cookies, though he asked for it back after I ate it!!! Carlos was very taken with Stephen……he always seemed to migrate to Stephen. We noticed that Carlos was very observant of his surroundings and what was happening. When Stephen stood up from playing on the floor some coins jangled in his pocket. Immediately Carlos asked Stephen for money and said (through the translation of the Special Mom) he wanted to use the money to buy eggs. We were able to spend about 45 minutes with Carlos. I wished it could have been longer, but our flight was leaving soon and we could barely spare the 45 minutes we did stay.
First Family picture with Carlos
Before leaving Hannah’s Hope we signed the paperwork for Carlos’ adoption. The director told us that we should take about a week or so to pray and get council before making a decision. We knew that our boys should remain together in the same family, we just weren’t sure if our family was the right family.
I cried most of our flight home. I loved Jeremiah so much and the thought of giving him up was excruciating. But I was terrified, how I could I be a parent to a 4 year-old AND a baby. Stephen and I had read quite a bit about adoption, about adopting older children, about RAD (reactive attachment disorder) and what we read was very scary. We knew almost nothing about Carlos’ birthfamily and his living situation. We didn’t know how to be parents. We had no idea where the additional finances would come from. But we did know a few things. We knew that God provides. We knew that God is in control. We knew that God had given us a huge heart of love for one tiny baby boy and He could do the same for a little 4-year-old boy.
That first week home was soooooo difficult. Stephen and I decided that we needed to seek council from two or three people and pray. So we told no one else about Carlos. It was so hard! I felt like I could not rejoice and be happy because I was not sure if Carlos and Jeremiah were going to be our sons. Our emotions were so high.
I had just started doing a Bible study with a group of girls from my church. That week we were studying Genesis 24. In this passage Abraham’s servant goes to find a wife for Isaac. As I was reading this scripture the last verses of this chapter were so powerful to me (v. 50-51):
Then Laban and Bethuel answered and said, “The thing has come from the LORD; we cannot speak to you bad or good. Behold, Rebekah is before you; take her and go, and let her be the wife of your master’s son, as the LORD has spoken.”
Reading this verse I felt just like Laban and Bethuel. This “thing” (the situation) our son Carlos was from the LORD. Carlos was here before us and we should take him and go (bring him home and make him our son). Stephen and I had many conversations about the circumstances surrounding our trip to Guatemala.
1. We were approved to adopt two children
2. We held out on other possible referrals to accept Jeremiah’s referral
3. Adoptive families usually traveled to Guatemala Thursday/Friday and left on Saturday/Sunday. We found a flight for $350.00 each, but the return flight was on Monday. We decided the extra day was well worth the savings. And because we were in Guatemala on Monday we were able to sign the legal paperwork.
4. Our boys birthmom waited more than a month before making an adoption plan for Carlos. If she had placed them together at the same time we never would have received the referral since we were on the waiting list for one child and many families were waiting for sibling groups.
Stephen and I prayed, separately and together, we received Godly council, we talked and talked. And in the end I could not shake that God was saying, “Carlos is before you, take him and go.” And although God did not use this same verse with Stephen, he too came to the same conclusion. I love what Stephen wrote: “We know that this path will be hard and at times feel nearly impossible, but our God is a great God who holds the universe in His hand and knows the number of hairs on our heads. This idea of adopting two at one time was not our idea (trust us on that one!!), but His and He will guide our footsteps as we venture (or should I say dive) into parenthood.”
Has our dive into parenthood been easy…..No WAY! Would I trade our beautiful Guatemalan born sons……NEVER! Has God been faithful to our family……ALWAYS!
First Family Picture with Jeremiah
A family united!
House of Smooches 