Sorry Dude…..New plans

Yesterday morning I grabbed my phone from the nightstand before I got out of bed……yes, my eyes were barely open, and I read Matthew Chapter 2. It’s a very familiar passage and very fitting for this time of year. But I was stuck as I read the words…….Over and over an angel comes to Joseph and tell him, “sorry dude, plans have changed.” I mean, just think about it. Here’s Joseph diligently growing his carpentry business. I can just imagine he’s working hard to have enough money to be able to “afford” a wife and family and……… bam………angel. “Your girl Joseph, she’s having a baby that’s not yours but you need to marry her anyway.” Well that changes things just a little, right?!?!?

But it’s not just before Jesus is born, it’s a whole bunch of times after…….Wealthy dudes come with gifts and then……… bam…….dream. “You have to move Joseph and not just across town. Try another county! And don’t wait, leave right now….as in the middle of the night.”

So finally the bad king dies and it’s safe to return home………bam……..dream again. “ok moving time again Joseph. Pack it up and let’s hope people need houses or tables or whatever back in Israel so you can keep this family alive.” Finally, they are going home……I don’t know how long they were in Egypt, but I do know that moving is a huge pain and I can’t imagine doing it with only a donkey and a cart (ok they might have had a better means of transportation, but somehow I doubt it).

So Joseph thought he was going home, but bam again!!……..yet another dream. “So Judea is not the greatest place (king’s son reigning and all) so give Nazareth a try.”

Each time God moved Joseph to a new location it was “So that what was spoken by the prophets might be fulfilled……..” I wonder if Joseph knew this…….That each move was designed by God for a very specific reason. Do you know this truth? Do I know this truth?!?!? I pray that God will give me faith like Joseph. He never questioned God. He just obeyed.

I wonder what new “place” God wants me to “move” to this year. Will I obey like Joseph, quickly and without making a huge fuss. Will I obey even if I can’t figure out why in the world God would want this or that to happen. Will I obey not matter how daunting or difficult the task. Will I obey even if it seems crazy.

The prophets might not have foretold my life, but God has each day, each good work, planned for me from the foundation of the world.

 

 

Of Christmas Past

The Christmas season always leaves a little longing in my heart for a baby. I’m not sure exactly why……perhaps it’s the fact that the entire season is the celebration of the birth of a baby. For most of my married life I’ve either spent the Christmas season longing for a baby, doing paperwork for a baby, waiting for a baby to come……..and then year after year God added a new baby to our family. Each year a new little face appeared in those lovely PJ clad Christmas morning pictures. Oh there were a few gaps here and there and in those gaps I’ve always felt a strong longing for a new face. This year was no different. Yes, I’m crazy because I half expected to get a phone call says, “we have a baby for you.” There’s no logically reason we would get that kind of call…….paperwork and finger prints are LONG expired. But still there’s just something about the Christmas season that pulls at my heart. And even crazier is the fact that we DO have a new face in our Christmas pictures this year. And that is where God has us during this season of life…..big faces joining our family!

And since nostalgia is so strong I just had to pull out all the old photos of Christmas past and enjoy those moments all over again.

The Christmas Crazy — we were kids! December 2003

 

The Christmas our Paper work for adopting from Guatemala was completed — December 2004

Carlos very first Christmas celebration at Hannah’s Hope Guatemala — He’s in the very back. December 2005

I’m pretty sure these were Carlos’ very first Christmas gifts

 

Jeremiah Christmas in Guatemala — December 2005

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Christmas 2006 — Together at last!

 

 

The Sweet new face in 2007

Three little faces on Christmas morning — 2007

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

See what I mean, another new little face — December 2008

 

 

 

 

 

 

December 2009 — I thought I was getting paper work to start an adoption this Christmas, but I had to wait until my birthday in February.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

December 2010 — waiting for our new baby

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sweet baby Jadyn Hope — December 2011

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

December 2012

 

December 2013

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

2014 — A new face……just not a tiny baby face 🙂

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

This year 2015

 

Domesticated!

First day of our Christmas break at the School of Smooches and I’m feeling pretty domesticated!! I was planning to clean my house, but decided to complete a project Stephen helped me start on Saturday.

Months ago some friends gave us this white “dresser” and it’s been in the girls room ever since. But I really wanted to add a covered cork board to the door (in fact for a few months we just took the door completely off because part of it broke and wouldn’t stay together). Well, another friend gave me a huge cork board and on Saturday Stephen cut it up and fitted the door back together. I found this perfect patterned material at Joanne’s on Saturday and today my mom helped me cover the door. I LOVE it! So we also decided to do the board for the little boy’s room. They both turned out so nice!  I just love having a “permanent” house that I can decorate. So much fun!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Not quite as much fun…….doing the mending tonight. But I got 3 pieces repaired and I have three happy kids with clothing that doesn’t have holes anymore!

Loss — November National Adoption Awareness Month

 

Adoption always begins with loss.

Loss is a small word with such huge meaning. We’ve all experienced loss, even early in our lives as young children. And it’s true, we adopted because of a loss.

Adoption is often spoken of as a triad…….birth family, adoptive family and child. Because we’ve never met our kids’ birth mama’s, I don’t know from personal experience that loss, but I live every day with children who feel the loss of their first family. And I feel loss.

That loss has modeled me into a much different person than I would have been had I not experienced it. Do I ever wish I could go back and undo the loss and pain…….actually no! Because truly I wouldn’t be who I am today……very literally.

I was sure pregnancy would come easy and probably before I was ready, after all I come from a family of 7 kids. But it didn’t. Long dark months turned to long years of longing and loss. And a lot of asking why. Why God?! Why not me? The most dreaded day of the year……Mother’s Day. That day where I forced a smile on my face and wiped tear stained eyes and hoped I could muscle the courage to make it through the day. Empty arms. A body that malfunctions. If only I could will a baby, I would.

Loss.

Hurt.

Grief.

Ache so strong it takes away your breath.

When I think back to this period of time I remember that pain very vividly. Having kids hasn’t taken it away, even having a biological child. The scar remains and always will. Scars are not all bad, they are reminders of a battle…..a battle you fought and won!

And from this loss hope was born. Hope in a God who grows families in many different ways.

What has the school of loss taught me? It has given me empathy. This grief over what “should” have been gives me compassion when I see my children struggling with their own “should have been”. I know that loss. I’ve experienced it. Oh not the same loss, but still it’s a familiar companion.

November — National Adoption Month

November is National Adoption Month and so to honor that, I will be posting often (life is way too crazy to say every day, but I hope to post a few times a week) this month my thoughts on adoption.

“Yes, there will be some who don’t understand why you’d want to adopt. Some of them may even be related to you. This is because for many who’ve never experienced adoption, adoption seems to be simply Plan B for people who can’t have children. They’re not able to see the beauty of adoption in and of itself. So be it. What better opportunity for you to model the God who adopts from every tongue, tribe, nation, and language and sets all the children together at the same table with the same inheritance and the same love?”

Russell D. Moore/Adopted For Life

 

It happened on a rainy day!

5 A.M. and the house is still dark and the household is still sleeping. This day I’ve been dreading for several months. A little over four years ago I knew this day would come, but the past two months it’s been weighing on my mind heavily. Since last week I’ve been meditating on

Joshua 1:9 – Be strong and courageous. Do not be frightened and do not be dismayed, for the LORD your God is with you wherever you go.”

Such comfort in these ancient words of Scripture!

Yesterday morning I knew it was time to prepare Jadyn. Since she’s only four and doesn’t really get time, I didn’t want to tell her too soon that she would be having surgery so yesterday morning as we were snuggling together and I told her. Jadyn asked if the special doctor would have toys. I said, “maybe and if they did what would you like?” She replied, “a ring and a pretty necklace. But I’ll give the necklace to you mommy because you need a pretty necklace.” Such sweetness! Several times throughout the day she would if it was time yet to go see the special doctor (and I knew I made the right choice not to tell her too soon).

5:30 A.M. and the house is still dark and sleeping. Stephen, Jadyn and I are off to the hospital. Stephen drops us off at the North Entrance..

5:55 A.M. We check in and I give them my cell phone number for the first time (I have no idea why, but I will repeat this number 6 more times and guess how many times they call me during the surgery……zero!! It must be one of those weird hospital things. When I had Ben, they asked me for my address about 10 times. And every time I wanted to scream……”in labor here and the address hasn’t changed in the last 5 minutes.” Haha, must be a weird hospital thing!). We wait in the common waiting room for about 15 minutes.

6:20 A.M. Our very sweet nurse comes out and we follow her to surgery prep. She gives Jadyn a special nightgown and I try to play it up…..”oh look you get to wear this special nightgown. See how cute it is!!” Yeah she wasn’t buying that AT ALL…..I mean it wasn’t even pink! The nurse verifies my info…..yep, same cell number. She the turns on cartoons for Jadyn and we talk family history. The nurse gives Jadyn a big zip lock full of stickers. Jadyn picks out her favorites and she puts them on the air mask that in an hour will be used to put her to sleep. For about 30 minutes we hung out and then it got busy.

7:05 A.M. The anesthesiologist and his fourth year resident arrive. They both listen to Jadyn’s heart and talk to her……mostly she ignores them….who can blame her……cartoons are way more interesting. While the anesthesiologist and I are going over the consent papers, the surgeon and her resident arrive. Our little space becomes quite crowded. Jadyn is calmly watching cartoons and hugging Jaxon (her special pet). I verify my cell number two more times…..or is it three?!?!? Who knows! The doctors leave and we have more space.

7:20 A.M. time to put on my “special gown”, shoe covers and mask. I gently tell Jadyn that she gets to take a ride on her bed and that I will go with her. And off we go……to the OR. That horrible feeling starts in the pit of my stomach. We walk down long hallways.

7:25 A.M. The nurse says, “ok here’s the OR. You will need to put on your mask.” I take a deep breath. And repeat in my head, “this is just a room. This is just a room with people. Do not be afraid, the Lord is with you.” No matter how many times I’ve entered the OR with one of my babies, I get that same horrible feeling…..there’s just something so hard about leaving your child in the hands of others (even if they are very qualified and experienced).

7:27 A.M. “Ok Jadyn, we are going to move you over to this special bed. You can bring your blanket and your special pet. What’s your pet’s name?” Jadyn replied very softly, “Jaxon.” And the anesthesiologist said, “oh I like that name. Do you spell it with an X?” And Jadyn said, “I don’t know how to spell yet.” Bahahahah. So from now on we will refer to Jaxon as Jaxon with an X. As Jadyn was settled on the operating table (which by the way was covered with these air cushions that were pumped full of warm air……way more comfy than a hard table!) I kept my hand on her arm and gently talked with her. And in my head I was repeating “this is just a room. This is just a room with people. Do not be afraid, the Lord is with you.”

7:35 A.M. the anesthesiologist says, “ok we are going to take this little tube and blow some air on her cheek. This is not the yucky smelling air Jadyn, so you can just breath this in nice and easy.” And to me he says, “this has medication that will help her fall asleep and also help her not to remember this part at all.” As the air moved over her cheek her eyes got all crazy-ish and they kept darting back and forth. Then they took the mask and covered her nose and the anesthesiologist said, “ok mom, she might start fighting, but it will only last 10-15 seconds.” Well, boy did she ever fight that nasty smelling sleep medicine! And I had to laugh a little inside because neither of my boys fought it, but my girly, she wasn’t going out without a fight! And it took her about 30 seconds to calm down and give in, but finally she did and she was asleep. Once she was calm the anesthesiologist said that I could move around by her head and give her a kiss before I left the room. That was a sweet moment.

7:40 A.M. The nurse walked me back to surgery prep and I got our stuff and another nurse took me to pediatric surgery waiting. And there I waited and prayed and ate a banana because I was famished.

8:50 A.M. The surgeon came to let me know that Jadyn was doing great and that the surgery was finished. What a relief!

9:05 A.M. a mystery person called the waiting room phone to let me know that I could go to recovery and be with Jadyn. She gave me directions but I promptly got lost (geographically challenged girl here), but I found a kind hearted nurse who took pity on me and walked me to recovery. Good thing too because I NEVER would have made it with the directions I was given!!

9:14 A.M. Jadyn was pretty “out of it” when I arrived. Poor baby girl just could not keep her eyelids open. Took a little while, but she finally woke up enough to drink some juice and eat some fish crackers. Sweet girl never cried the entire time we were at the hospital!

9:53 A.M. I texted Stephen to let him know we were ready to be discharged!!

10:23 A.M. We are headed home! Yay

Jadyn spent the rest of the day lying on the couch watching movies! Every now and again she would say her tummy was hurting. So we would rearrange the pillows and she was good to go! My mom stayed with three younger kids while the big boys were in school. So she taught school, cleaned my house and picked up my big boys when school got out early!! What a huge blessing. Then in the afternoon, my middle kids went over to her house to play and I fell asleep on the couch for about an hour.

Final thoughts: Jadyn has been my best patient yet! She did amazing. I feel a huge weight lifted now that the surgery is done! Last night I was thinking back over the boys’ surgeries and I was thinking about Jeremiah’s and I remembered carrying him into the OR being hugely pregnant. And I thought to myself, “now who was I pregnant with?” Then I stopped myself and almost laughed out loud (poor Stephen was snoring away, so that would have been rude). Ah, dude, you’ve only been pregnant once!! Haha I must have been really tired.

Day two! Really amazing that this girly had surgery yesterday. Playing pretty much like normal today. Still walking a little hunched over, but not on any pain meds. Praise the Healer of broken hearts and broken bodies. Thank you Jesus!

Summer Styles and Great Shampoo

Free hair! Unbraided and ready to wash!

Hair is a big deal at our house. When we have hair day sometimes it’s an all-day affair. And I’m always looking for just the right products for my girls. And boy have we been through the products. When I became a mama to a curly girl 8 years ago I had no idea what I was doing (ha, sometimes I still feel that way). But the great thing about curly hair…..it’s very forgiving!

Not sure Jadyn is ready to forgive yet though, hehe

I bought a ton of different “ethnic” products but soon found that the fragrance was very strong in most of them and none too pleasant. There’s nothing worse than cuddling up to your baby and smelling a very strong almost foul odor coming from her sweet head because of the hair products! So those products went bye-bye. Some products were too thick, some smelled too bad, some left goop, some have a TON of harmful chemicals and some did nothing at all. So we worked our way through the list……down to a couple that smell good, had only a few ingredients and worked.

At some point in this “curly hair” journey I found ChocolateHairVanillaCare. And that changed my whole approach to hair! I want my girls to grow up to love the hair God has given them. I want them to feel beautiful.

Sweet sisters wanted “matching” hair

Yes, I want them to feel beautiful. And hair is a big part of that! God made all different hair types (curly, straight, wavy, thick, thin, red, yellow, black and brown) and they are all beautiful. No matter what culture and fashion might say is in, I want my girls to love the locks God gave them. And my part in that is helping them to know what works for their hair and helping them to keep it natural and healthy.

For Jadyn I found Kinky-Curly products (our local Target carries them). The Shampoo (called Come Clean) is perfect for Jadyn and the leave in conditioner, Knot Today, pairs perfectly with coconut oil. However, for I was not impressed with either product for Natalie’s hair and I still hadn’t found a good detangling rinse out conditioner for either of my girls.

Over the past year, Natalie’s hair has become increasingly dry. After each shampooing (once a week in the summer when we swim and less in the winter when we aren’t swimming) I noticed that her hair was brittle and dry……honestly, it felt like straw. After shampooing I was using a TON (filling the palm of my hand 3-4 times) of conditioner just to try and rehydrate her hair. But the hair wasn’t absorbing the conditioner…….it just sat on the hair follicles. I tried all kinds of shampoos and conditioners…..all with the same result.

 

Last fall I joined Young Living (the largest Essential Oil Company in the world) and they have a line of personal care products including shampoo and conditioner. So I decided to order the Copaiba Vanilla Moisturizing shampoo and see if it made any difference.

Young Living Shampoo and Conditioner

Let me tell you……it was worth EVERY penny! By the second shampooing I was completely sold. Natalie was able to detangle her hair in the shower before I even put on the conditioner……All-by-herself! A first…….both detangling by herself and detangling without conditioner)!! And her hair felt amazing. No more straw hair!! I was so impressed I put the Lavender Mint conditioner on my order the next month to see how it would WOW me! Did it ever too! Natalie’s hair actually absorbed the conditioner (using other conditioners her entire head of hair would be white). After about 30 seconds you can’t even see the Young Living conditioner and detangling, while I won’t say is a breeze now, it’s much easier!!  I use the conditioner on Jadyn’s hair too and it works wonderfully for her too!

The only downside to the Lavender Mint Conditioner is the strong peppermint scent. Natalie is not a fan. Peppermint is a hot oil that actually gives a cooling feeling (now that’s a funny sentence) so it does leave your scalp feeling a little tingly and cool (which I love, but she doesn’t). So I will probably order the Copaiba Vanilla conditioner just for Natalie.

 

*I didn’t receive any compensation for recommending these products.  However, if you want to purchase Young Living products I will be happy to send you information to get started  and I would love for you to join my team!!  And if you chose to do that……. I will receive compensation 🙂

 

Here’s a few more hair styles my girls have sported this summer:

Four heads of hair all in one day!

 

Down hair made with two strand twists

The most elaborate hair style (with lots of parting) that I’ve done yet!

 

 

Jadyn with twists and a big puff

Déjà vu!

 

Almost a year ago I posted about big changes happening in our family. Funny how it feels like Déjà vu! Yep, we are getting a new house (yay!!). We never anticipated that “a few weeks to a few months” would turn into almost 12 months, but we feel SO blessed to have been able to spend the past almost 12 months living in the “Grace transitional home” as we fondly call the manse! Living just down the hill from church has made the commute fantastic (no, we are still late) and we really enjoy people popping over since they are in the area (when we lived in the country no one ever “popped over”). And the kids have especially loved having access to a big flat parking lot for bike riding.

The house hunt was pretty discouraging for months. We have some very specific needs and a few specific wants too, so the number homes that fit into those categories was slim, very slim! But God provided and we will close on our new home at the end of July! Two things drew us to this house, a big mostly flat back yard and the fact that it had 6 bedrooms in the upstairs! And as an extra bonus, our new house is only two blocks from my mom’s house!

And since we have 6 bedrooms, I just couldn’t stand the thought of an empty room, so we are adding a new kid to our family!! Our Chinese son Sam will be coming back to live with us again and so will his cousin, Leon (yes, that’s the American name he chose). So we will have a full house with two 17 year olds, 14, 10, 8, 7 and 4 year old!! I am excited to see what God has in store for us this year!

No one will be going to a new school this year, just moving up to a new grade. Carlos, Sam and Leon will all be attending RVCS and Jeremiah, Natalie, Ben and Jadyn will all be attending the School of Smooches (what we fondly call our home school). Jeremiah and Natalie both asked to go to “real” school this year, but after several discussions weighing the pros and cons Stephen and I decided that WE (me) are not ready for them to go away for school yet, so we will keep them at home this year (and as always, evaluate school for next year).

So, that’s a quick update. I honestly am going to try to be a better blogger. I miss it and it motivates me to keep up with my journaling!

Big blog update!

So since it’s been a while since I’ve done a big update blog post, I thought a nice rainy Thursday would be the perfect time. Honestly I’ve been pretty hit and miss on blogging in general lately. I blame it all on having 6 kids, The Mentalist and starting a home based business. And yes I know it’s super lame to blame a TV show for my lack of blogging, but hey watching 6 seasons takes a LOT of time, haha.

So I guess I’ll start with a kid update, since I mentioned them! My big boys are almost done with their first year at RVCS…..oh and by big boys I mean Carlos and Sam (our international student). It has been a good year for both of them, with lots of stretching to be sure! We are very happy with Carlos being at RVCS and plan for him to return for 8^th grade this fall. Carlos thrives on structure and routine, he likes being around people, so “real” school has been a very good fit for him. Oh sure, we’ve had bumps and potholes (that felt like massive craters at times) but we are thankful we made the decision for Carlos to go to school outside of our home. Sam will be returning to China in about a week. It’s hard to believe that 10 months have passed so quickly. We feel that we will be losing a family member when his flight leaves. We have enjoyed a taste of China, literally since Sam is a fantastic cook, and hope that he has enjoyed his taste of the House of Smooches! In many ways Sam has brought a sense of hope to our home. We have learned how to be better parents to teenagers. One huge lesson……communication it’s hard no matter what language you speak!

So that’s the big boys, now for the middle kids! Jeremiah, Natalie and Ben played soccer this spring……Natalie and Ben’s team were in first place and undefeated but lost by one point in the championship game! But they played hard and had an amazing season! Jeremiah played hard this year and really improved in his confidence. This is our last week of school at the School of Smooches and we are SUPER happy about that!! Natalie and Jeremiah have both asked to go to RVCS next year, but I think we will homeschool the middles again next year……I can’t imagine being home all day with just one child! That would be so strange! We have some fun things planned for the summer that involve lots of swimming!

Baby girl Jadyn…..how is it possible that my baby will be 4 this summer!! And how is it possible that my 3 year old is wearing 5/6!! Jade is my super tall girl. I’m sad that the “baby phase” seems to have quietly passed on. Sometimes I really miss having a baby. But having “older” kids also means a bit more freedom. No one requires a nap, if bedtime doesn’t happen until 9 or 9:30, mom’s the only one having a meltdown! Unless God has a big surprise in store for us……looks like Jade will be the baby of this family. Not sure yet how I feel about that………

House update: Not much to say. We’ve made an offer on one house twice…….they won’t budge……we won’t budge. They want too much $$ for the value of their home and we just aren’t willing to go that high, so we wait. When we moved into the manse I thought it would be for a few weeks to maybe a couple of months. Never thought that 10 months later we would still be “homeless”! I cannot tell you how blessed we feel living in the manse! And the commute to church is amazing J Don’t worry, we are still late, haha!! I’m not real sure what God has in store for us, but I keep clinging to his promise that “my God shall supply all your needs according to His riches in glory.”

Stephen is actually enjoying his “new” job now! Took a few months for the kinks to be worked out, but now he is much less stressed at work, which is a good thing. He’s been leading the worship team at church for about 18 months and does a fantastic job selecting music and leading the team (that’s my little brag moment). And sometimes I get a little preview on Saturday night.

And lastly, my new venture………It’s been 9 years since I held a “real job” and for the past year or so I’ve really wanted to do something to add to our family’s income, but in a way that would not take away from the responsibilities I already had. And that’s when, quite by accident I became a distributor for Young Living Essential Oils and started “working the business side of oils”. Well, becoming a distributor wasn’t an accident (who can resist a 24% savings by being wholesale, especially when it doesn’t cost anything extra AND you can earn free oils!!), but doing the business side of oils was quite an accident. I’m not a sales person……not at ALL, but oddly enough I love teaching classes and talking about the benefits of oils. And Young Living oils are so fantastic that they literally sell themselves! And so here I am 5 months later loving my oils and wanting to share the benefits with anyone who will listen 🙂

Well the rain has stopped and the sun has come out……so it’s time to go pick strawberries!  Have a fabulous day!

Gymnast

Since January Natalie has been taking a gymnastics class…..and LOVING every second of it! She uses the trampoline to practice her new found moves. Natalie has amazing athletic ability and is very agile and strong so she has done great in her class. I was so proud that after just a few months she moved to level 2! We are taking a break for the summer and will evaluate sports in the fall so I’m not sure of her future as a gymnast, but I am so proud of her hard work!